Robin Hood- no good!

From the fingers of me Homie


I never thought I'd say that I felt a longing for Kevin Costner's Prince of Thieves that didn't even bother to set up the English myth with a British accent...especially as I'm not the biggest Costner advocate, but Ridley Scott's Robin Hood left me with a taste for some of that 90's cheese and campery.

After Gladiator, one would have hoped that Ridley Scott would have been able to make a good job of creating an epic journey- in fact, you'd think the legend of Robin Hood would save half the trouble as an already well-established myth. But perhaps that was half the problem: how do you put your own stamp on such a prolifically portrayed story?

Scott sets up the story for a gritty, realistic tone- Russell Crowe's Robin is a mere common archer in the English army and Cate Blanchett's Marian is a mud spattered Lady-cum-farmer. The landscape is very grey, brown and English- but this was something that you started to miss throughout the film. There was no vibrancy, no life pulsating out of the film as there was in the rich palette that Gladiator gave us.

Another issue was the fact that the realism was spoiled by accents that were completely unbelievable. Blanchett swayed from received pronounciation to Lancashire lass, Crowe was a melting pot of Brummie, generic Northern and Scottish, whilst it took a bland sheep shagging joke for me to realise that Will Scarlett was supposed to be Welsh. The suspension of belief that was necessary to be transported to a realistic depiction of medieval England was broken the minute that someone opened their mouth.

Overall, the whole film felt as if the Editor and Director had spent most of post-production arguing or being confused. You never spent enough time with any one character to really care that they died/fell in love/had justice served. The scope was too big and perhaps would have fared better as a television series that could have fully plunged into the depths of all the factors in the script.

Every element in the film felt half-arsed and reeked of complacency with a massive pay check behind it. Marian and Robin's love story is usually up there with all the old romances, and yet Crowe and Blanchett's on- screen relationship was as passionate as a wet fish in the face. And as the big baddy of the film, Mark Strong was not given enough face time to make me care.

Apathy kills any creative work more than invoking the strength of hate or dislike. And trust me, this Robin Hood brings on apathy in spades.

I'll leave it on this note- it is what it is, and it is an absolute waste of time. If you want a fix of the Hoodster, I'd go with Costner, Sean Connery, Errol Flynn, Disney, Mel Brooks or even the BBC's recent televisual escapades any day.

A rather limp 2/10